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January 24th, 2012:

More Spam

If you’re married and DO NOT want to get divorced but are interested in having an affair, then we want you to understand that You are NOT alone!

There are thousands of married people in your city that feel the same way that you do.

Not Newt Gingrich I hope! That would be both cruel and unusual. Or Billious Clinton. Or Ryan Giggs (though he keeps his infidelity strictly in the family rather than on the internet).

This is why you need to join the Ashley Madison Dating Agency that was created for married people that want to have an affair without getting caught.

If you join the Ashley Madison Dating Agency you will be able to have sexual relationships with other married women or men that DO NOT want to get divorced, but want to have a discreet affair without being caught.

After you have an affair you will feel ALIVE and HAPPY once again…You’ll feel like you did when you were single and dating new people.

Undoubtedly true. Every time the phone goes you shall sprint in a manner that makes Usain Bolt look like Christopher Biggins.

In fact, you may start feeling like working on your marriage again to make it better…You just need that spark again in your life that only someone new can give you.

Yeah… I can really see that. I have often found myself reaching new heights of sexual arousal after kitchen utensils have been hurled at me with murderous intent.

Go here if you are interested in learning more:

[yes, the fuckers quoted my email]

If you’re not married and reading this message, then you can also join the Ashley Madison Dating Agency to meet married people that would love to have a sexual relationship with you.

Or you could do what normal people do and hook up with another single person via bars, restaurants, facebook… They will also have a penis or vagina (according to tatse) and you won’t have to have a coronary episode getting to the phone only to discover you have been paying too much for payment protection insurance or indeed even have to learn to dodge hurled pans.

Listen, we understand that you’re worried about getting caught and possibly getting divorced, but if you join today you’ll see how easy it is to stay married and enjoy multiple affairs with many people.

How? There’s only so many “business trips” you can make and some of them (at least) have to be about business – and not of the monkey variety.

You don’t have to pay anything to join today…just check it out and see what you think.

I think not.

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