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Britain’s got talent…

I’m going on it next year.

I’m going on with a lesbian Oompa Lumpa who will do the usual song and dance schtick until I shall proceed to beat her to death with a leg from a Queen Anne dining set. The act is to conclude with a full chorus of Rule Britannia!

If that doesn’t knock Simon for six then I am fucked if I know. I mean the howling, pissing and moaning will be something else. And that’s just from me – not the orange dwarf that dies for our pleasure.

I think I might call it “the aristocrats”. Or I shall just stage a wombat gang-rape. Why not?

At least it isn’t another fucking urban dance collective.


  1. Lynne says:

    You don’t actually watch that crap, surely?

    As for myself, I despair of TV as a whole, particularly at weekends, but enjoyed a trip down memory lane on BT Vision last night – Christopher Eccleston’s foray into Dr Who. I never really appreciated it when it first hit the screens back in 2005. Age has been kind.

  2. NickM says:

    Yes, I do.

    I watch the first rounds. The rest are like toss. as to The Who. Well, God loves a sinner come to His understanding. It would be bizarre if the BBC didn’t occasionally get it right. I mean they have huge monies and all. I did an MSc in astrophysics in Godelian spacetime. And that is CTWs – closed time-like worldlines. Woo woo stuff!

  3. Scottish73 says:

    The dug won.

    I truly fucking despair.

    This cuntry is seriously fucked!!!!

  4. CountingCats says:

    What is the point of posting a comment which is nothing but an empty stream of obscenities? Are you truly incapable of expressing a meaningful opinion?

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