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The Second Coming…

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.

- William Butler Yeats.

Yeah, like whatever because you don’t need a blood-dimmed tide when you have this

David Alexander, 39, of Seaton Delaval, Northumberland, was shocked when he looked over and saw the image of Christ appear above the dashboard of his friend’s car.

Having said that I am sceptical about the second coming in Seaton Delaval because I’ve been there and the the odds on finding three wise men and a virgin in that neck of the woods must be extrememly long.

Mr Alexander, who works as a support manager for a data marketing analysis firm, said: “I was sitting in a friend’s car on Sunday night.

“We were about to set off when an image manifested itself on the driver’s side of the windscreen.

“I could see a face staring back at me – it looked just like the Turin Shroud – except it looked like Jesus was smiling back at me.

Ant & Dec Themselves were unavailable for comment. They had a prior engagement on a taco in Yucatan.

Or possibly the wall of a Chinese take-away in Sunderland* (same article). Having said all that Alan Pardew reckons NUFC might win the Europa Cup. It would appear belief in miracles is alive and well in my native land.

*If God incarnated in Sunderland to look upon His Creation we are all, to use a technical term, fucked. At least they seemed to have fun (whilst it lasted) in Sodom and Gommorrah but Sunderland has been joyless buggery since the year of our Lord 1179.


  1. RAB says:

    I’m pretty good at discerning shapes and faces in things that don’t actally contain them (my mum has a Walnut wardrobe that is superb for it), but I’m buggered if I can see Jesus in that! Asort of Super Mario face towards the top perhaps…

  2. NickM says:

    I can’t even see the plumber :-(

  3. Simon Jester says:

    To me it looks more like Osama bin Laden – long black beard at the bottom, bushy sideburn and moustache towards the middle, huge schnozz directly above ‘tache (light apparently gleaming off it), raggedy turban on top.

    Not sure whether it’s relevant, but I have *never* been able to see the “intended” image in those Magic Eye illusions.

  4. Simon Jester says:

    (Also bushy eyebrows between schnozz and turban.)

  5. RAB says:

    I assumed that it was a picture of some dust cloud on the edge of Alpha Centauri before I read your text.

    Ah well signing off for a couple of hours now. Over in Cardiff on the bloody Dongle again… Rather an important game of Rugby just about to start. If we win expect those mayhem binge drinking pics in the Daily Fail tomorrow (they have a photographer on permanent contract for them you know) :-)

  6. RAB says:

    Oh I could see the Magic Eye 3D things eventually (there’s a trick to it). Whatever happened to them? They were even going to do wallpaper in them. That would have been a horror story eh?

  7. John Galt says:

    I can see Robin Williams in his full Bicentennial Man Robot costume.

    Shame on you anyone who can’t see it!

  8. RAB says:

    Wales 30, England 3….

    Both Severn Bridges have been closed to high sided vehicles, low sided vehicles, short stubby fat vehicles and Robin Reliants… in fact any vehicles entering the country that are not beer trucks. Send more booze immediately or a bunch of very morose English persons will not be allowed to leave. Normal service may be resumed by Monday.

    Fuckin magnificent or what?!!! The fastest most ferocious and exciting game I have seen in decades.

    You’re wearing those Gay Goggles agin aincha John? ;-)

  9. NickM says:

    Fuck Off! We was looking at the Grand Slam you Welsh fuckers! Well, fair play to your fellas. And the French get the spoon most wooden which ought to be bestowed by Her Majesty directly up the arse of M. Hollande.

  10. JuliaM says:

    Oh! Jesus, you say? I thought it was Brian Clough…

  11. John Galt says:

    “You’re wearing those Gay Goggles agin aincha John?”

    Always RAB, always.

    Although my own personal tastes are a lot younger and less hirsute than Mr. Robin Williams who, to quote the inimitable Edmund Blackadder “looks like a monkey who’s been put in a suit and then strategically shaved”.

    Not into “Bears”

  12. NickM says:

    Brian Clough was obviously bigger than God.

  13. RAB says:

    Well he thought so. :-)

    Finest Manager England never had.

  14. NickM says:

    In the fine city of Nottingham he is bigger than God. I mean back-to-back European Cups with Forest! The mighty of Madrid, Munich and Manchester quaked in their boots.

    They have a statue and everything. They also have a statue on the University Campus of D H Lawrence (who they denied a degree) holding a butterfly in a way that makes the deranged beardy twat look like he’s going to crush it out of sheer evils and of the WWI fighter-ace Albert Ball, VC. He had other decorations but do two bars to a DSO really matter when you have a VC? Oh, and he had “matinee idol” looks…

    Of course the schoolgirls of today can faint over Harry from “One Direction”.

    Would it be too cute for me to extend the flying metaphor and suggest that Harry’s true One Direction is radial* and Sir Isaac Newton is in the driving seat?

    *Folks have for roughly a hundred odd years (like the war we once had with France over Brie or something) fought over what makes time special. Now I have my views here – basically thermodynamics and Copenhagen – but here is an interesting one taught to me by Clough (Professor Stan Clough, University of Nottingham** in his lectures on General Relativity)

    **Yes, Whilst a physics student at Nottingham and whilst Brian ruled the roost for the footie at The City Ground my personal tutor was a Professor Stan Clough. Great fellow. Top notch physicist – he was on the team that invented MRI (2003 Nobel for his senior partner – Sir Peter Mansfield). It caused some hilarity with my mates up Norf as a student because they thought I was taking ze piss by saying my tutor at Nottingham was a Clough. That is how famous and linked to Nottingham Brian Clough was. But hilarity aside – one of the best teachers I ever knew. I never met Brian.

    I was though supervised for a 10 credit (out of a total of 360) experiment by a fresh-faced tank-top wearing chap (and he was a “chap”) called Dr Kent who looked like he’d just come from Smallville. He introduced me to web-browsers. I’d been doing it via the con before that. So I typed “Ferrets” into Mosaic and got 50 hits on the Eastern Seaboard of the USA alone and thought and the rest is history. More bizzarely I was taught EM 1,2 & 3 by a Dr Maxwell. And he was the spit of the Dr Maxwell. Beard – check, balding – check, 40s – check, awkward sod – check, accent from the Celtic fringes – check. Except he wasn’t Glaswegian but Belfast though it was near enough to be spooky.

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