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Cooking with Nick Griffin

Yes, you heard it right. For my next trick I suspect it’ll have to be kite-surfing with the Dalai Lama.

Anyway, Nick Griffin, the now bankrupt leader of the BNP is presenting cookery shows on Youtube. I suppose it’s a bit like de-snagging LANs with Hitler. Or something. “Goering, you never told me this network was installed by a Herr Cohen!!!”. I digress and must move on because I have a 9am building a tokamak with Ant & Dec.

Anyway, here is the new Nigella in all his shambolic glory.

Well, there are things to note. I can cook and a beef casserole is one of my “signature dishes”. OK, I’m not exactly Michel Roux Jr (who is a perfidious frog, obviously – despite being a UK citizen – and my Mum fancies him!) and Mr Griffin cooked this veritable feast upon an Aga which is of course Swedish and we don’t want those Scandies coming over here with their affordable, but unfathomable furniture and their raping and pillaging of Lindisfarne (Northumberland folk-rock *shudder*) and all that. I once saw a doc about a plumber of Pakistani origin who fixed Agas. He was making a mint out of deranged cougars in Surrey who thought the path to enlightenment required the boiler from the Great Eastern chugging away in their kitchen. Anyway this guy who was doing well (and fair play) branded himself as “The Aga Khan”. It amused me.

Please watch the whole thing if you can. It is long but hilarious in parts. Some of it didn’t exactly amuse me though such as Nicky wearing a “Help for Heroes” shirt. I wonder what the Gurkhas or the many other Commonwealth troops in our armed forces think of that? Or what women make of it or how anyone who isn’t a total moron takes his advice on the need to remove the foil from a stock cube? Well the last one is funny. As are some similar “Top Tips”…


  1. bloke in spain says:

    Granada Cuidad?
    Freezing in the winter, an oven in summer. Very nice in the week between the two..

  2. John Galt says:

    “I’ll definitely second Nick on Malta Paul. Cracking place. I’ll second Lord Byron on Valletta too… A city built by gentlemen for gentlemen…”

    Thirds on Malta. I took my mother on a holiday there in the 1996 in the middle of January. Fantastic place with wonderful scenery, nice weather and decent people. I remember sitting on the window sill at 3 AM watching a lightning storm out over the Mediterranean, it has remained with me ever since.

    It’s one of those places that everyone should visit at least once.

  3. Paul Marks says:

    I will visit somewhere this year (if I am spared) – but who knows where.

  4. NickM says:

    Well, RAB, I was in Malta in late October and you could swim!

  5. Julie near Chicago says:

    NickM — “I was in love with an American (it can happen).” I dunno, Nick. In this world of infinite possibilities anything can happen, but thankfully it rarely does. And FYII, Falling in Love with an American — Comme il est tres passé! ‘Fraid you’ll have to take off another 80 days when you are abducted from this mortal plane?

    And I see nothing wrong with a gaggle of Zanzibarians lighting up our shores and holding fireworks displays to dazzle our lives. I am SO anxious to go to your place myself, but various items I’ve read persuade me that you-all glow in the dark … *grimace*

    Paul — Ulster? Wind and rain?? I’m on my way! Too bad it’ll take me a few days to print the necessary funds.

    Well, my dears, I must say good-night now. Have the pleasantest of dreams, including good food and satisfactory companions. ;)

  6. Paul Marks says:

    Julie – the Antrim coast is worth seeing (castles and so on – as well as the Giants Causeway), However, there are many places in the United States that have wind-and-rain

    Washington State springs to mind – as long as one avoids the potheads of Seattle.

    I would have done the opposite to Glenn Beck – if I was born and raised in Mount Vernon Washington State I do not think I would have gone to New York or Dallas Texas (Dallas may have lower taxes than Washington State, but not by much – and I do not like big cities., although the centre of Indianapolis is interesting, and hot gray plains), I would be more likely to move the other way.

    Coastal Texas might suit me better – till the mighty hurricanes come.

  7. NickM says:

    Being from the NE of England (windy) and now living in the NW (rainy) wind and rain doesn’t do it for me.

  8. Paul Marks says:

    Then the centre of Oz is for you Nick.

    Also the most geologically stable place in the world.

    Nothing has happened there for millions of years.

  9. John Galt says:

    “Dallas may have lower taxes than Washington State, but not by much – and I do not like big cities.”

    You’re joking surely? the centre of Dallas is comparatively tiny although the suburbs do stretch on for mile after mile. It might be cheap to buy land, but it’s not particularly pretty. Give me the woodlands of New England or the rocky forests of the Pacific North West any day.

    Texas is just plain big, flat and dull.

  10. Paul Marks. says:

    John Galt – I think that is what I said.

    An urban area that goes on for “mile after mile” (and boring burbs at that). In a dull plain.

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