Not long since I went to the newsagent and bought a pack of cigarettes. For this brief excursion I wore trainers, socks, underwear, a T-shirt, combats and a hooded-top or clothes as they are normally called. It would appear though that actually getting dressed to go out is a dying art (and we are not talking suitable attire for the opera either)…
Elaine Carmody had chosen her “best ones” in which to do the shopping. But not even this was enough to prevent the mother of two from falling foul of the new dress code at a branch of Tesco in South Wales.
Bosses at the St Mellons store in Cardiff have banned customers from shopping in their pyjamas, after members of the public complained that the sight of people pushing trolleys in their nightwear made them feel uncomfortable and embarrassed.
St Mellons! Have I died and been re-incarnated as Sid James?
Those entering the store are now greeted by signs headed Tesco Dress Code Policy. “To avoid causing offence or embarrassment to others, we ask that our customers are appropriately dressed when visiting our store (footwear must be worn at all times and no nightwear is permitted),” the rules decree.
Footwear must be worn at all times. I mean I know we had a recession but…
Ms Carmody, 24, was one of the first to be escorted from the premises by a security guard yesterday, after choosing the comfortable option to “pop in for a pack of fags”.
Is it just me (and my clearly Victorian values) but why did I feel the need to put on proper clothes (and to have a shower) before going out to buy ciggy-wigs?
“I’ve got lovely pairs of pyjamas, with bears and penguins on them. I’ve worn my best ones today, just so I look tidy,” she said, unhappily. “He said it offends people. But I’ve never seen anyone offended. If you’re allowed to wear jogging bottoms, why aren’t you allowed to wear pyjamas in there, that’s what I don’t understand. It is ridiculous and stupid. I go in other shops in my pyjamas and they don’t say anything.
Dear Mother of God! Why the flying fuckulence would anyone want to be seen wearing pyjamas in public? I mean nothing against them per se - my wife wears them - but my wife wears them in the bedroom, not in the fucking fish aisle of Tesco. And no, love, they are not the same as jogging pants. Jogging pants at least imply some level of physical activity. I have to H/T the missus for this one and she (helpfully/sickfully) pointed out that wearing pyjamas to the supermarket probs means not wearing a bra and that means duggs a swingin’ and (I quote a woman here) “unfetterred minge” and my wife was very insistent that anyone with so little self-respect that they go shopping in their PJs would not be wearing a bra or knickers. It’s a horrible thought but you just know that Ms Carmody is composed primarily of duggulent substances. And it weren’t me that first brought-up the word “duggs” in this context.
But wait… It’s not just the Welsh…
It is not the first time that pyjamas have been banned in public. In May 2007 staff at a GPs’ practice in Ancoats, Greater Manchester, imposed a ban after patients started turning up for appointments in their bedwear. A doctor at the clinic said: “We’ve had complaints. It’s lazy.”
That’s just up the road from moi. Ancoats though is an utter shiteration of a gaff. It has a Currys. I shall give it that which is (to quote my gran) pretty much leaving it with nowt but it’s eyes to weep with.
Also in Belfast, the headmaster of St Matthew’s Primary, in the east of the city, sent a letter to parents asking them to dress properly on the school run after 50 mothers turned up at the school gates in pyjamas. Joe McGuinness said that it was “slovenly and rude”.
In 2008 a Dublin café erected a “no pyjamas” sign, and in 2006 the Gulf emirate of Ras al-Khaimah introduced a dress code to stop people wearing their nightwear to work.
It’s spreading… It’s got to Shanghai.
We is all buggered.
PS written at my wife’s computer whilst wearing very little…